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File sizes are something that you want to have as small as you can get while still keeping the look and feel like you want. I am not sure on the exact size that peole find exceptable, but I have seen that normally you can get everything you need into a file in a few KB. Images also need to be watched, again I am not sure on the largest you want to have them, but I suggest using gif and jpeg when they will do, with compressed png for things that need better graphics with transparency kept in tact.
As for standards, it really depends on what you are going for. If you want to have it look the same cross-browser the standards may actually hurt you in your progress, however if you only want to support browsers that support the standards it can make your life a lot easier. In general I don't worry about going with the standards as IE 6 tends to have its own standards to follow, after that I worry about getting it to work in the other browsers I want to support.
Hope that helps.
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